So I happened to watch Remo D'Souza's latest offering 'A Flying Jatt' last night. The idea of 'desi' superheroes sounded interesting and I looked forward to meet this 'Jatt who kicks butt'. Never in my slightest imagination did I think that what I was to witness minutes later on screen would be something like this-
1. Some good 2D flash animation in 'Chal Chaliye' song to show, 'What goes around comes around.' Mother Nature couldn't agree more to this! Yeah, that's the opening credits.
2. Oh wait a second, is that Kay Kay Menon aka Malhotra's villainy den? Looks more like a futuristic spaceship instead.
3. 'I don’t pick up a Rs 1,000 note if it falls on the ground. I’d lose a crore of rupees in business if I lost that split second of time.' #HowToBeAMillionaire.
4. Nothing can beat a 'maa' ka 'whiskey' walla thappad!
5. *YAWN* Even the kids ain't interested in their martial arts teacher Aman aka Tiger Shroff's 'Bruce Lee' moves.
6. Thank God! I don't live in a housing society where everyone breaks into a 'Bhangda Pa'
at the drop of a hat.
7. Aman's dad was a Shaolin-expert and nicknamed 'A Flying Jatt'. #JustDiscovered
8. Music heals everything...SRK's Raj Aryan would be so proud bro! #ThatMohabbateinConnection
9. The game of hide-and-seek gets a 'threat'
10. Be careful the next time you visit a desert. There might be some Raka (Nathan Jones) lurking around like a ostrich burying its head in the sand.
10. Aman vs Rakka (Round 1)
11. Mumbo-jumbo! Apna Aman's got some super powers. Raka is thrown away somewhere far in a heap of industrial wastes.
12. Meanwhile our superhero is smitten by Sunny Leone! *breaks into Baby Doll jig*
13. 'Mera beta super hero ban gaya'. Maa ka pyaar
I tell you! *sheds tears of joy*
14. Time to learn how to be a true-blue superhero! Costumes. Check. Flying Skills. Check. New Name. Check.
15. Major problem of every super-hero. Sleep-deprivation. And I thought I was the only one *LOL*
16. OMG! Flying Jatt just saved a crowd from a group of terrorists in slow-mo *rubs eyes in disbelief*
17. Apna Flying Jatt toh famous ho gaya...balle-balle!
18. Things your unpopular sibling does to grab attention.
19. Oh no, Raka is back as a ugly looking thing! One of the doctors exclaim, 'His blood is now black'. Wow, scientific discovery of the year! *slow claps*
20. Raka is ready to battle Flying Jatt but on one condition! He too needs a special costume for himself.
21. Even Indian superheroes can't escape from daily household chores.
22. Now you know what to tell your kid the next time he refuses to eat lauki!
23. Market place becomes battle ground. Flying Jatt (Aman) vs Raka (Round 2)
24. Who says superheroes don't have a love life?
25. What the f*ck! Kriti (Jacqueline Fernandez) couldn't recognize that Aman is Flying Jatt despite wearing those thick glasses!
26. You don't need super powers to be a super-hero! (I couldn't agree more after surviving the film until now)
27. While 'Koi.. Mil Gaya's 'Jaadu's food was 'dhoop', Raka derives Glucon-D like instant energy from pollution. What an idea sirji!
28. 'Usne toh Shakti Kapoor ki beti ko chuna'..LMAO
29. Some sach ka saamna for Kriti followed by love confession.
30. Flying Jatt shakes some 'Beat Pe Booty' with his lady love in the middle of what looked like a jungle!
31. Flying Jatt vs Raka with dark circles. Round Three. Unfortunately this time he beats our superhero to pulp! *sigh*
32. Okay, so basically Mr Malhotra could have made a good EVS teacher with all that environment gyaan! Alternate career anytime bro?
33. Mission Swachh Bharat Abhiyaan activated.
34. Oopsie.. Malhotra's lil daughter suffers from a severe asthma. Did someone just say Karma bites?
35. 'Bhai ki maut ka badlaa'. I know where this is heading next...
36. On the other hand, Malhotra tells Raka to stop the menace and offers money but the evil man be like 'Meri rooh kaali ho gayi hai'!
37. Fret not, 'Flying Jatt' Tiger zinda hai.
38. It's a bird..it's a plane..it's 'A Flying Jatt'!
39. Indian superhero carries Raka to the moon to cut off his energy supply for a fair game. Smart boy! Kicks and punches follow in the outer space with the asteroids and satellites witnessing the epic battle. (Toss those gravity lessons out of the window, please!)
40. Surprise, surprise! No, I wasn't when the movie ended! Guess I am going to be off superhero flicks for a long time! Till then might re-watch 'Heropanti' and 'Baaghi' to get over this!